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Children Adoption in marriage
How does one adopt a child?
Adoption laws vary from state to state. For adopting a child who is not related to the
adoptive parent or parents, there generally are two types of adoptions: agency adoptions and
private adoptions.
What is an agency adoption?
As the name implies, the parents work though a licensed agency. The agency often
supervises the care of biological mothers who are willing to give up their children, and it assists
in the placement of children after birth. Agencies screen adoptive parents--often extensively--
before the adoption proceeds. Some agencies have long waiting lists of parents. Some agencies
also specialize in placing children born in foreign countries.
What is a private adoption?
Private adoptions bypass the use of agencies and they may help bypass the long waiting lists
as well. The process may begin when people who seek to adopt a child contact an attorney
who specializes in adoptions. The attorney may work with physicians who are aware of women
willing to give up children for adoption. Sometimes would-be parents will place ads in
newspapers seeking women who are willing to place their babies for adoption.
In most states, adoptive parents are allowed to pay a biological mother's medical
expenses and certain other costs during the pregnancy. But adoptive parents are not allowed to
pay the biological mother specifically to give up the child. The law treats this as a "black market
adoption," the buying and selling of children, and it's a crime in every state.
Is court approval necessary for an adoption?
Yes. Court approval is needed for both agency and private adoptions. Many states also
require that the adoptive parents be approved by a social service agency.
Can a biological mother revoke her consent to adoption?
Yes, but there are limits on her right to revoke consent. In most states, a biological mother
who initially consents to a child's adoption before birth, may revoke that consent after birth. In
other words, the mother's consent usually is not final or binding until a certain period of time
after birth. In most states that time period is relatively short, such as two to eight days. If a
biological mother consented to adoption during the proper period of time after birth, it is much
harder for her to revoke her consent. Following an after-birth consent, a biological mother
generally may revoke her consent only if she can show that there was fraud or duress. Fraud
could be found if the adoption agency or attorney lied to her about the consequences of what
she was doing. Duress might exist if a person at the adoption agency threatened the biological
mother with humiliation if she did not sign. A biological mother's change of heart normally is not
enough by itself to revoke an after-birth adoption consent. Although a mother may feel
emotionally drained and under stress after birth of a child that she plans to give up for adoption,
that type of stress usually is not enough to revoke an adoption unless the person or agency that
obtained the mother's consent used harsh tactics to obtain her consent.
Is the biological father's consent necessary?
Generally, yes--at least if the biological father is known. He should be notified of the birth
and pending adoption so that he may consent or object. If the father is not known, the adoption
may proceed without his consent (although adoptive parents can feel safer about the validity of
their adoption if the biological father has been notified and agreed to it). If a biological father is
not notified, he may later contest the adoption if he acts within a certain period of time after the
child's birth or adoption. (Six months is a typical time period, although the period varies
between states.)
What is a "related adoption"?
A "related adoption" is one in which a child's relatives, such as grandparents or an aunt and
uncle, formally adopt a child as their own. This might occur if the child's biological parents are
deceased or are otherwise unable to care for the child.
What is a stepparent adoption?
A stepparent adoption is one in which a child's biological parent marries someone who
wishes to adopt the biological parent's child and is able to do so.
What happens if the child's other biological parent does not agree to the adoption
by the stepparent?
If a biological parent does not consent to the adoption of a child, the child cannot be
adopted by another person unless a court first finds that the biological parent is unfit.
What is the definition of an unfit parent?
Parental unfitness is determined by state law. Normally, an unfit parent is one who has failed
to have regular contact with a child or to contribute to his or her support. A parent is also unfit if
he or she has been abusive or has otherwise failed to provide adequate care for the child.
What happens if a stepparent adopts his spouse's child and the parents later
divorce?
A divorce does not affect the legality of the adoption. The stepparent continues to have all
the rights and responsibilities of a biological parent, including a right to seek custody or visitation
and a duty to support the child.
Can a single person adopt a child?
Yes, although some agencies strongly prefer to place a child with a married couple. Other
agencies--particularly those dealing with children who might be hard to place--are willing to
place a child with a single person. Single-parent adoptions usually are possible in private
adoptions.
Can lesbian or gay couples adopt a child?
Yes, in some states, such as New York and California, gay and lesbian couples are able to
adopt a child.
What is an "open adoption"?
An "open adoption" is one in which the adoptive parents agree to let the biological mother
(or biological father) have some continued contact with the child after the adoption. This contact
might be periodic visits or an exchange of pictures and other information between the adoptive
family and the biological parent or parents. The nature of the contact often is specified in the
adoption agreement. Open adoptions have become more common as more birth mothers have
become involved with choosing which adoptive family will receive their child. But open
adoptions are a relatively new phenomenon, and in many states it is not certain whether an open
adoption agreement is enforceable by the birth mother.
Who has access to adoption records?
In most states, court adoption records are sealed and can only be opened by court order
(although Oregon allows all adopted children access to their adoption records). Procedures and
standards for opening records vary by state. Increasingly, states require that certain nonidentifying
information, such as the medical history of the biological family, be made available to
the adoptive parents at the time of adoption. Some states also have registries where parties to
the adoption can agree to a later exchange of information, including names and addresses.
What is the legal status of an adopted child?
An adopted child has exactly the same rights as one born to his or her parents. Similarly,
adoptive parents have the same obligations to the child as they would to one born to them.
What about medically assisted pregnancies?
As medical science advances, there are a variety of ways in which individuals who wish to
become parents can be helped to do so by medically assisted means, including artificial
insemination and in vitro fertilization. These medical procedures have legal implications that vary
by state. Generally, however, if both husband and wife consent to artificial insemination or in
vitro fertilization, the rights and duties of the husband, wife, and child will be the same as if the
child had been naturally conceived.
What is surrogate parenthood?
In this arrangement, a woman agrees, with or without payment, to bear a child for another
couple. This usually occurs when the wife cannot conceive or carry a child to term. In nearly all
cases, through artificial insemination, the husband's sperm fertilizes an egg belonging to either the
wife or the surrogate mother. This makes the husband the biological father of the child. The
surrogate mother agrees to give up all parental rights at birth. Then the wife of the biological
father legally adopts the child. A few states outlaw this arrangement when the surrogate mother
receives payment. Other states are considering laws that would restrict it. Persons
contemplating such an arrangement should seek legal advice before entering into such an
arrangement.
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